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BlueMonday1984

827 Game Reviews

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Visuals are pretty neat and disgustingly detailed, but they do get in the gameplay by making it hard to tell where gaps in your stack are.

The engine itself's also half-baked - rotate goes only one way, hard drop's nowhere to be found, and there's a pretty unacceptable delay when activating soft drop.

Visuals are pretty damn impressive. The only thing that didn't hold up is the bouncer's design - guy looks like a Golliwog on 'roids.

Gameplay's also pretty solid - sure, I found the mouse-based controls pretty awkward on my mousepad, and Britney was a major annoyance, but beating K-Fed's ass and getting Britney out the way with some good-old fashioned child abuse were both still fun as hell. (A sentence which will never be written again.)

Also, quick question: Who the fuck is Kevin Federline? I've never heard of this guy before now.

Between Plot Token #7 and the boss zombie, I can see some elements from Dead Detention II bleeding into this. Quite like it - ramps up the tension a whole lot.

Really loved that twist with the inventory - loved how you took what was originally a fourth-wall breaking gag and turned it into a moment of pure terror.

Another goddamn excellent episode, overall.

JackAstral responds:

Thanks so much!! :-D

A massively expanded version of Rock-Paper-Scissors, with several smaller versions in case the full 25-gesture version's too much? Can't argue with that.

I do like how the gestures are laid out - everything the gesture beats is on its right, everything that beats it is on its left. Makes the outcomes a lot easier to digest.

This seems pretty quaint nowadays, considering Bieber branched out pretty far from his teen-pop origins in the mid-'10s.

The bottle, knife and shuriken all hit to the left of where my mouse is, which complicated aiming for me a fair bit. Combine that with Beaver's erratic movement and the travel time of every weapon except the handgun, and you've got a pretty difficult target to take down. Still pretty fun, though.

(Sidenote: The handgun looks to be based on a CZ-75, but I can't pinpoint what the rocket launcher was based on.)

An extremely charming and fun send-up to one of gaming's most beloved heroes, and an excellent little time capsule of its era.

I won't claim to have recognised many of the cameos/references here, but the game more than stands up on its own.

Gameplay is effectively just a lengthy series of fetchquests, but it works well enough to tie the whole thing together.

A cute little joke Flash, made to cook up some quick-and-dirty shittalk.

I'd personally recommend coming up with your own insults over using this (for a variety of reasons), but its pretty fun to see what put-down the word slot machine will come up with.

Its like using an LLM, except its existence isn't ruining the Internet.

I'll admit, my expectations were pretty low going into this - slots have always been too luck-based to keep me hooked - but I ended up having a surprising amount of fun with this.

This is due to a combo of the rollers being player-stopped, and the lights underneath providing a means to time your stops. With those two, this slot machine actually has an element of skill to it.

Having a heavy dose of that classic Duke Nukem charm DEFINITELY helped.

Slots have never been my kinda thing. Way too luck-based for me.
If you're into that shit, you'll likely enjoy it, but I personally found it pretty dull.

As for visuals, the low-quality 3D modelling for Armor Slots' symbols, the techno-futuristic font used in certain places and the choice of soundtrack all just scream "mid-'00s Flash" to me.

Main highlight's the soundtrack. Its pretty enjoyable.

This might not look like much now, but this blew people's minds when it first released. Full 3D in Flash was unthinkable back in '06, even in a form as basic as this.

Gameplay-wise, its a dead-simple idea, executed well - naturally, it holds up just swell.

Newgrounds is damn good.
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